Me: Do you want a treat? Dog: A Treat!? Yes! Me: Here you go. Dog: Throw it! Me: Here. Dog: Why aren’t you throwing it!? Me: Just take it. Dog: Dear God, just throw it! Me: Take it from my hand. Dog: I WILL fight you!
Archive | Writing
I’m not much of a writer. I’m much better at crafting and making things with my hands. But, sometimes, writing is the best way to express things that you can’t express visually. So, occasionally, I’ll write something down that catches my interest. Anecdotes, stories, poems, articles, or whatever amuses me at the time.
New Shoes
Me: MY SHOES! WTF!? Dog: What? Me: These were brand new! Now they’re ruined! Dog: Oh. Can I have them, then?
A Poem From My Dog
Here’s a poem from my dog. I think she was heavily influenced by Hughes Mearns, but she denies it. As I barked from the stair I barked at a man who wasn’t there. He wasn’t there again today. I barked and barked so he’d stay away.
Chocolate For Dogs
Dog: Wha-cha eatin’? Me: A chocolate bar. Dog: Can I have a bite? Me: No. Chocolate is poisonous to dogs. Dog: It’s not poisonous to humans? Me: No. Well…it’ll make us fat. Dog: Why do they even sell this stuff!? Me: Because it’s SOOOOOO good! Dog: … Dog: Can I have a bite?
Crackers
DOG: I heard a box of crackers. Did you hear crackers? ME: No. DOG: You’re eating crackers! ME: Fine. *sigh* Yes, I’m eating crackers…but they’re not for dogs! DOG: That’s OK. I’m just going to stare at you while you eat those delicious crackers. ME: … DOG: …